Written by C Hues
December 18, 2022
Attempt 1: I take a brown egg; I crack it hard. Not hard enough. Now, trying to peel it open, the hard shells mix with yoke. What a joke. Attempt 2: I take another brown egg; I crack it hard. Too hard. Expensive eggs—at least they’re not wasted. The egg shoots into the bowl. I turn on the pot with water. Add some vinegar. I slowly, slowly, slowly pour the egg into the pot— Too fast. Not enough water. It looks like a fried egg. I still see the yoke. Attempt 3: I go to McDonald’s for an Egg McMuffin. Fuck poached eggs.